When I did the night shifts at Samaritans, it used to take me days to get back into to a good routine.
When I get disturbed at night now, I’m useless the next day!
It got me wondering how on earth did I manage with a baby and a toddler?!?! Those nights when one was sick and the other would wake. Or just get used to having a baby in the first place needing a feed every 5 mins (felt like it anyway!)
This is something we don’t seem to appreciate as new mums, as partners, as families or as a society to some extent.
We’re still expected to carry on as normal and do ALL that we did before, forgetting that simply having a baby is much more, perhaps more than everything we’d done before.
Working 24/7, non stop, very few breaks, hardly having time to even have a hot shower, hot meal or even a hot drink. And going to the loo in peace becomes a distant memory.
So you lovely mums, please don’t forget that even though it feels you’re not doing much, not managing all those tasks that were part of your unthinking routine, you ARE doing LOADS!
You’re learning a new job, a new routine, juggling new dynamics with conflicting advice, judgements and self doubt.
And looking back now with my babies 18 and 16 I find myself remembering those silent nights feeding them, when it was just us, when those heart melting smiles when they were happy to see me, when I felt pure love and gratitude.
So whatever you’re going through now, it will not last. And, luckily all those nights when we were both crying, when I felt lost and alone, like a failure, frustrated and angry…and those negative feelings seem to be dissolving, leaving snippets of beautiful memories.
You’re doing great and are just where you need to be, in THIS MOMENT in time. <3
Thank you for all the work you are doing xx